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* * *
The script is finished, and the artist I am working with is amazing. We are working closely and addressing publishing options. It is critical that this be right.

Fragile Creatures

Which is a tale in six parts, of uncertain morality and dubious intent

This is not a celebration or a condemnation. Those who find such things within these covers are, in fact, terribly and tragically misguided.

 

Pauci es servo , infinitus magis es damno;

Illic est non satis salus praecessi inter

 

For Lili
Alas, I appear to have run out of red candy.




This is a "bucket list project I have been wrestling with for more than a decade. I finally lived enough to finish it. I hope it sees print soon... because
"lIlic est non satis salus praecessi inter"


But you know that.



Current Mood:
calm
Current Music:
"Can't See" - Boingo
* * *
Sometimes, there are no good choices.

Right.

Current Mood:
cynical
* * *
Who do I have to thank for the Tibetan Mala beads? 

They feel good... I'm wearing 'em now, mingling the juju.

 

Thank you.


Current Mood:
cheerful
* * *
From Fetlife cometh THIS pearl, this gem, this treasure:

"Hello Master,

Thank you very much for your sincere interest in our well trained Slave jelly. Slave jelly is a well trained and one of the top slaves in this great organization, she is well oriented and a lady with high sense of humor,intelligent, very submissive and obedient will serve you well. I personally will recommend her because of her outstanding qualities and determination.

After we read your email today, we had a brief meeting with my board of directors to discuss about your wishes, and we concluded by calling her into the meeting for a brief interview during her leisure period, to know about her interest as a person you intend to secure from our Association, but i think we should say you are fortunate that she responded well as i can feel it in her that you are exactly her Match, and which we hence have no obligations against since she has agreed to choose you as her Master.

But i think it is important we let you know that you should try and be fast with every arrangement you want to make in securing slave jelly as your own because we cannot afford to delay her if we find another potential master that is ready to secure her immediately,and again we cannot allow you into this camp until you have paid to show some kind of commitment on your own side too.

But however, before the release of Slave jelly from our Association you will have to go through the necessary procedure as we do in our great organization.We shall require you to give us some information, in order to keep records on where slave is been traded to and who own them after our trainings, and then after you shall pay us off the sum of 750 pounds for our BDSM care,upkeep and training fee which enable slaves to serve master in a more submissive manners till they get satisfied.

Let us know when you have sent the required payment by getting back to us with all the necessary information,However all this is been done to ensure your slaves are in good hands and not with some nuts or serial killers who derives pleasure in maiming or torturing their slaves to death.

This fund is payable via Western Union Money Transfer.

And after you have undergone the two(2) process by giving us the required information and paying of the BDSM fee, you have own the slave completely from our association and you can hence negotiate any other thing privately with slave as you wish and please yourself. Then we can release all slave traveling documents and international passport and free them to locate you down your destination.

So kindly get back to us if you wish us to proceed with the release of slave jelly, so that all the necessary papers can be work out immediately.

Thank you,

The Association president

Keep watching the skies, hoss- I hear they air drop 'em second day. Just paint a big "X" on the trailer roof, so they know which doublewide to aim for.


"I have a cunning plan, M'lord!" - Baldrick
Current Mood:
amused
* * *
The people I love are no longer to be sick, get fucked with, or even inconvienced further, in any way.

Furthermore, any matters of their mortality will henceforth be submitted to this office in triplicate for review and approval.

This shit stops now.

Thank you for your attention

Flagg

PS: This includes your motherfucking swine flu. I am watching you.

Current Mood:
angry
* * *
For just about twenty years, give or take, TES has been a fundamental part of my life. When my health began to fail, i was at the heart of my involvement - presiding officer of the BOD, with Board members I had genuine regard and high hopes for. There was, for the most part, real teamwork and a pretty unified drive by hardworking people to make things better.

But my body betrayed me, and I spent more and more time away from a place and community i had worked hard to put my mark on, to improve and help grow. Eventually, I could not do it anymore. My health, my medication, my stamina, my liberty, all these things were so terribly compromised. The men who succeeded me - Sweetcandymike and Naylandblake are both worthy and capable men, so i felt, that in that respect at least,  TES was in good hands.

I'm stronger now, more whole and alive than I've been in years. I miss a lot about TES. I am thinking of trying to make the effort to reconnect with my lost roots, reintroduce myself to a body which may not know me at all, to faces I may not recognize, to a place which has changed in ways I don't know and may not understand.

Is anybody still out there? Anyone left? Is there anything there? Has it grown? Died? Changed?  Flourished?

It's going to have a price to do this; everything always does - is it a price worth paying?






Current Mood:
contemplative
* * *
No such luck- pancreas was not viable. We now resume our regularly scheduled programming.

Current Mood:
annoyed
* * *
So, I'm off to the hospital again. If it all pans out, an unfortunate 28 year old will be providing me a kidney and pancreas to harvest; plump, juicy organs to siphon youth and vitality out of in a more direct fashion than my usual way (moving in with them.)

So, I'm off -I'll have my cell, Harley is with me, If it happens at all, it will be about 8 AM Saturday , so most of you won't even see this until it's already been resolved, one way or another.

Here goes nothing.

Current Mood:
anxious
* * *
I was born with the wrong sign
In the wrong house
With the wrong ascendancy
I took the wrong road
That led to the wrong tendencies
I was in the wrong place at the wrong time
For the wrong reason and the wrong rhyme
On the wrong day of the wrong week
I used the wrong method with the wrong technique

Wrong

Wrong


There's something wrong with me chemically
Something wrong with me inherently
The wrong mix in the wrong genes
I reached the wrong ends by the wrong means
It was the wrong plan
In the wrong hands
The wrong theory for the wrong man
The wrong eyes on the wrong prize
The wrong questions with the wrong replies

Wrong

Wrong

I was marching to the wrong drum
With the wrong scum
Pissing out the wrong energy
Using all the wrong lines
And the wrong signs
With the wrong intensity
I was on the wrong page of the wrong book
With the wrong rendition of the wrong hook
Made the wrong move, every wrong night
With the wrong tune played till it sounded right yeah

Wrong

Wrong
(Too long)
Wrong
(Too long)

I was born with the wrong sign
In the wrong house
With the wrong ascendancy
I took the wrong road
That led to the wrong tendencies
I was in the wrong place at the wrong time
For the wrong reason and the wrong rhyme
On the wrong day of the wrong week
I used the wrong method with the wrong technique

Wrong

"Wrong" - Depeche Mode

Current Location:
The center of my universe
Current Mood:
savage
Current Music:
Take a guess
* * *
I have received two anonymous gifts in the post again this week - a DVD collection of I, Claudius (which I have a deep love for); and a copy of A Life Interrupted, which looks like it's going to hurt... which is rare, and good. So- thank you. Please feel free to let me know who has shown me such kindness.

Current Mood:
grateful
Current Music:
Doubleplusgood!
* * *
I just gave my first interview about The Forked Tongue, in a Podcast format at Erotic Awakenings. It was fun, and the interviewers were even handed, fair and smart. I'm pretty pleased.

  Here's the actual link to it.

http://eroticawakening.libsyn.com/index.php?post_id=446431#

* * *

There's a nail in the door
And there's glass on the lawn
Tacks on the floor
And the TV is on
And I always sleep with my guns
When you're gone

There's a blade by the bed
And a phone in my hand
A dog on the floor
And some cash on the nightstand
When I'm all alone the dreaming stops
And I just count sand

What should I do I'm just a little baby
What if the lights go out and maybe
And then the wind just starts to moan
Outside the door he followed me home

Well goodnight moon
I want the sun
If it's not here soon
I might be done
No it won't be too soon 'til I say
Goodnight moon

There's a shark in the pool
And a witch in the tree
A crazy old neighbour and he's been watching me
And there's footsteps loud and strong coming down the hall
Something's under the bed
Now it's out of my hands
There's a big black crow sitting on my window ledge
And I hear something scratching through the wall

Oh what should I do I'm just a little baby
What if the lights go out and maybe
I just hate to be all alone
Outside the door he followed me home
Now goodnight moon
I want the sun
If it's not here soon
I might be done
No it won't be too soon 'til I say
Goodnight moon

Well you're up so high
How can you save me
When the dark comes here
Tonight to take me up
The mouth from woke
And into bed where it kisses my face
And eats my head

Oh what should I do I'm just a little baby
What if the lights go out and maybe
And then the wind just starts to moan
Outside the door he followed me home
Now goodnight moon
I want the sun
If it's not here soon
I might be done
No it won't be too soon 'til I say
Goodnight moon
No it won't be too soon 'til I say
Goodnight moon
- Shivaree "Goodnight Moon"

Current Mood:
exanimate
* * *
i got out to a friend's birthday gathering last night. I was walking a little further, a little longer, a little straighter. I had not gone all out, but I had some of my favorite clothes and silver, and was among some of my favorite people.

I felt adorned.

I had utterly forgotten how much I like to make an impression, an impact. How vain I really am. I've spent so much time dressed like an invalid in sweats and tees, ashamed of my limp and cane, that I had simply forgotten how much looking good rocks.

Some purchases were made today to continue to correct this problem. Fuck this. Time to start burning shit down again.

"It's the wallet that says "Bad Motherfucker" on it." - Jules, Pulp Fiction
'Pretty, pretty...' - Frank Booth, Blue Velvet

PS: Tell me this is not the baddest thing ever. I must own this.

Current Mood:
good
* * *
grabbed from z111

I hate memes - but this is about books that matter, so here we go:

The Big Read thinks the average adult has only read six of the top 100 books they've printed below.

1) Look at the list and bold those you have read.
2) Italicize those you intend to read.
3) Underline the books you LOVE.
4) Reprint this list in your own LJ so we can try and track down these people who've read 6 and force books upon them.

1. Pride and Prejudice – Jane Austen
2. The Lord of the Rings – JRR Tolkien
3. Jane Eyre – Charlotte Bronte
4. Harry Potter series – JK Rowling
5. To Kill a Mockingbird – Harper Lee
6. The Bible
7. Wuthering Heights – Emily Bronte
8. Nineteen Eighty Four – George Orwell
9. His Dark Materials – Philip Pullman
10. Great Expectations – Charles Dickens
11. Little Women – Louisa M Alcott
12. Tess of the D'Urbervilles – Thomas Hardy
13. Catch 22 – Joseph Heller
14. Complete Works of Shakespeare
16. The Hobbit – JRR Tolkien
17. Birdsong – Sebastian Faulks
18. Catcher in the Rye – JD Salinger
19. The Time Traveller's Wife – Audrey Niffenegger
20. Middlemarch – George Eliot
21. Gone With The Wind – Margaret Mitchell
22. The Great Gatsby – F Scott Fitzgerald
23. Bleak House – Charles Dickens
24. War and Peace – Leo Tolstoy
25. The Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy – Douglas Adams
26. Brideshead Revisited – Evelyn Waugh
27. Crime and Punishment – Fyodor Dostoyevsky
28. Grapes of Wrath – John Steinbeck
29. Alice in Wonderland – Lewis Carroll
30. The Wind in the Willows – Kenneth Grahame
31. Anna Karenina – Leo Tolstoy
32. David Copperfield – Charles Dickens
33. Chronicles of Narnia – CS Lewis
34. Emma – Jane Austen
35. Persuasion – Jane Austen
36. The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe – C.S. Lewis
37. The Kite Runner – Khaled Hosseini
38. Captain Corelli's Mandolin – Louis De Bernieres
39. Memoirs of a Geisha – Arthur Golden
40. Winnie the Pooh – AA Milne
41. Animal Farm – George Orwell
42. The Da Vinci Code – Dan Brown
43. One Hundred Years of Solitude – Gabriel Garcia Marquez
44. A Prayer for Owen Meaney – John Irving
45. The Woman in White – Wilkie Collins
46. Anne of Green Gables – LMMontgomery
47. Far From The Madding Crowd – Thomas Hardy
48. The Handmaid's Tale – Margaret Atwood
49. Lord of the Flies – William Golding
50. Atonement – Ian McEwan
51. Life of Pi – Yann Martel
52. Dune – Frank Herbert
53. Cold Comfort Farm – Stella Gibbons
54. Sense and Sensibility – Jane Austen
55. A Suitable Boy – Vikram Seth
56. The Shadow of the Wind – Carlos Ruiz Zafon
57. A Tale Of Two Cities – Charles Dickens
58. Brave New World – Aldous Huxley
59. The Curious Incident of the Dog inthe Night-time – Mark Haddon
60. Love In The Time Of Cholera – Gabriel Garcia Marquez
61. Of Mice and Men – John Steinbeck
62. Lolita – Vladimir Nabokov
63. The Secret History – Donna Tartt
64. The Lovely Bones – Alice Sebold
65. Count of Monte Cristo – Alexandre Dumas
66. On The Road – Jack Kerouac
67. Jude the Obscure – Thomas Hardy
68. Bridget Jones' Diary – Helen Fielding (are you frickin' kidding me??)
69. Midnight's Children – Salman Rushdie
70. Moby Dick – Herman Melville
71. Oliver Twist – Charles Dickens
72. Dracula – Bram Stoker
73. The Secret Garden – Frances HodgsonBurnett
74. Notes From A Small Island – Bill Bryson
75. Ulysses – James Joyce
76. The Bell Jar – Sylvia Plath
77. Swallows and Amazons – ArthurRansome
78. Germinal – Emile
79. Vanity Fair – William Makepeace Thackeray
80. Possession – AS Byatt
81. A Christmas Carol – Charles Dickens
82. Cloud Atlas – David Mitchell
83. The Color Purple – Alice Walker
84. The Remains of the Day – Kazuo Ishiguro
85. Madame Bovary – Gustave Flaubert
86. A Fine Balance – Rohinton Mistry
87. Charlotte's Web – EB White
88. The Five People You Meet In Heaven – Mitch Albom
89. Adventures of Sherlock Holmes – Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
90. The Faraway Tree Collection –Enid Blyton
91. Heart of Darkness – Joseph Conrad
92. The Little Prince (Le Petit Prince) – Antoine De Saint-Exupery
93. The Wasp Factory – Iain Banks
94. Watership Down – Richard Adams
95. A Confederacy of Dunces – John Kennedy Toole
96. A Town Like Alice – Nevil Shute
97. The Three Musketeers – Alexandre Dumas
98. Hamlet – William Shakespeare
99. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory – Roald Dahl
100. Les Miserables – Victor Hugo
Current Mood:
calm
* * *
My good friend Thudthwacker had a few friends over to celebrate his birthday.
On the way there, he tells me that his seven year old daughter had a... disturbing dream about it the previous night.Not scary, exactly, but... notable.

There were three guests at the dream party. The one he took special note of was a dark haired man, with a long, long tongue. It was split. You know...

Like a snake.

...

I like her even more now.

 


Current Location:
Home
Current Mood:
amused
* * *
I'm usually meme- allergic, but this is worth it.
Contracted from </a></b></a>[info]ravenbait

When you see this, post your favourite poem.
 

This Living Hand

 

This living hand, now warm and capable

Of earnest grasping, would, if it were cold

And in the icy silence of the tomb,

So haunt thy days and chill thy dreaming nights

That thou wouldst wish thine own heart dry of blood

So in my veins red life might stream again,

And thou be conscience-calmed—see here it is

I hold it towards you.

 

                                                  John Keats


 



Current Mood:
calm
* * *
I was aware that my new meds were making me erratic. I was not really aware of how erratic.

Recently I posted some savage, nasty things about a man who has always treated me with kindness, respect and friendship. Regardless of any disagreements we may have had, he never wavered in being supportive and treating me like a friend.

The things I said were unkind, inappropriate and vicious.

Wes, i'm sorry.

Current Mood:
distressed
* * *

I'm writing again.

This time, I want your help. If you have a tale that would fit with the type of experiences I am describing below, please let me know - I want to interview you for possible inclusion in the book. No one gets named who does not want to be.

There is no instruction, here. Only scars
.

This is not wisdom from an expert, or sage advice from someone who knows something special.

This is an accounting of mistakes, some of them funny, some of them terrible… a collection of blind alleys and dead ends. Most are mine, some are shared by others, but they all have something in common – we were all striving to get somewhere, to learn something - something that was important to us. Something which promised to define us, if we could only reach it. Something sacred.

Dominants are not encouraged to share our errors- not with those under us, and certainly not with each other. So, all too often we fumble along blindly, afraid of looking weak or foolish to our peers or partners, trying to embody the myth of infallibility like toddlers shuffling around in Daddy’s huge shoes.

Once we have made a move and we manage to make it work, often we will cling to it, wading out no further than the shallows we know, one trick ponies, soon to grow as tiresome as rabbits from hats, in danger of becoming cliché. Many Tops seem to live in terror of the looming possibility of failure, especially where our peers and partners are concerned. Mistakes are bad enough- but mistakes where someone might see? Oh, no. No, no, no. We often spend more time worrying and being afraid than we do acting, paralyzed by the daunting prospect and looming threat of embarrassment as if we are all at our first school dance, milling around the gym.

This is the fumbling towards the sacred, the road of excess that leads, one hopes, to the palace of wisdom. This book is about the various ways I have screwed up, made a fool of myself, and hurt people who deserved better.

This is about what I was lucky enough to learn from those times, those accidents, those people. These are my scars.

Without them, I would be nothing.

Current Mood:
contemplative
* * *
From The Twelve Terrors of Xmas, by John Updike, illustrated by Edward Gorey:

3: Santas Helpers

Again, what's really going on? Why do these purported elves submit to sweatshop conditions in what must be one of the gloomiest climates in the world, unless they are getting something out of it at our expense? Underclass masochism one day, bloody rebellion the next. The rat-a-tat-tat of tiny hammers may just be the beginning.

That, and two new, gleaming, wickedly sharp, spring - loaded implements of joy and dubious legality (but quite certain lethality) bring a smile to my face... and like the man says:

"Why so serious?"

Ho Ho Ho.
 


Current Mood:
grateful
* * *
I just received a truly beautiful gift- a gleaming new straight razor, engraved with the words "Bleed for Me."

Merry Christmas.

Current Mood:
pleased
* * *

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